No matter how old or young or what stage you are in life...we all want some type of approval from peers, parents and those in authority over us. But what do you do when you never hear those words that you “think” you really need and yearn to hear?
First of all, Approval defined is the action of officially agreeing to something or accepting something as satisfactory or the belief that someone or something is good or acceptable. Synonyms to approval are acceptance, agreement, consent or permission.
Admitting that we desire approval or validation from others is difficult, but recognizing it in ourselves is even more difficult because it is so very subtle. It gets hidden well beneath pride and low self-esteem. When we seek validation, we evaluate ourselves and others based upon external behaviors and choices, not on what Christ has done.
Second Corinthians tell us, “For the love of Christ compels us . . . and He died for all, that those who live should live no longer for themselves, but for Him who died for them and rose again” (5:14-15). We are loved by Christ, as shown in His death and resurrection, therefore we have been given the ultimate validation. This is the only true validation we need, and we have it.
God’s validation teaches us to regard no one according to their spiritual gift, their personality, their likeability factor, their racial or cultural background, or, yes, even their choices on open-ended issues. We regard them according to Christ’s validation. So does that include ourselves? Of Course!
I will admit that it hurts to not get approval in certain situations. There was a time in my life when I thought..."If only THIS person would say this or do that...then everything would be okay in me." What I was doing was putting someone else's opinions and reactions and placing it upon myself. When this person would not "take the bait" and compliment me or even acknowledge me about a certain accomplishment or success then I would be so upset. I put so much on this person to be my approval. I felt like a failure UNLESS they said this "something" and I just knew that when they finally would speak it...that it would just propel my life to another level. Haha. Doesn't that just sound outlandish??
It does sound outlandish but we all have been there. Approval from people doesn't come like we would like it. My husband has said for years, "Not everyone will celebrate with you." I had heard that over and over but I never truly understood what that meant for me personally. I had to come to the point that I don't need ANYONE to point me out or give me praise. God knows what I am doing and it isn't for the praise of people anyway. It took me a while to get to this place in my life....and it didn't happen overnight.
We all want to feel accepted and approved. The desire to fit in somewhere lies within all of us. We try on different identities, seek out different places, and search for our best fit. But if we listen close enough, we will hear a voice inside that tells us that we don’t belong here, because we are not from here. So you will NEVER find totally acceptance or total "completeness" with any human. We belong with God, and until we seek our acceptance and approval from Him, we will always feel just a little bit like an outsider.
Our true validation is knowing WHO we are in Christ and that means that CHRIST knows exactly who we are. He validates us every single day by speaking to us and loving us unconditionally. His grace and mercy never end and they are renewed to us every single day. Praises from man are temporal and fleeting. God's praises and His validation echos through eternity.
You Are Graciously Adorned
❤Jonna
