One day at work I felt so self conscious about a zit. I had "took care" of before work and could hardly believe that a 43 year old could still break out on a regular basis. UGH. But while I worked I could feel pain and a throbbing sensation on my face and I knew that it was "growing". I was working the trauma area in the emergency room and was no where near a mirror and no time to take a bathroom break! I would periodically touch it and it felt so huge and I began to visualize in my mind this pulsating and disgusting growth that surely everyone was talking about! I pointed it out to my co-worker and she said, "what blemish? I don't see one. Just a red mark." I was astounded that she would just blatently say that just to be nice and not be HONEST with me when I knew that she had to be mortified to be working next to someone who needed to go fix her face.
Finally I was able to take a break and made a mad dash to the mirror. I was SO shocked when what I saw was not a white mountainous pimple of disgust but rather a flat red bump that actually didn't look bad at all! I couldn't believe it! It felt, according to my finger SO very large and I just couldn't understand it. I laughed out loud at myself and about how silly I had been to have worried while I talked to doctors, patients and other staff about urgent matters of life or death while wondering secretly what they might of thought of my blemish and I even thought their eyes had wandered to where it was; when in reality...there was nothing there! How dumb!
My how we "feel" things sometimes and it is just a big distraction. We stress about little things that people may think about and for what? It is a big waste of time and resources. Sometimes we let our feelings blow things out of proportion and it effects our relationships and the way that we feel about ourselves. We perceive that people are talking or looking at us when in fact that is the farthest things from their minds. Our emotions can wreck us. It can get us so side tracked that we miss that someone is needing us or that God is directing us or opening a door for us but we are so consumed with this "thought of ourselves" that we are not able to actually SEE what is truly going on with anyone else.
Don't let silliness get in the way of you being who you are called to be. Get your focus off yourself and what your not or what you think you should be. Maybe it is in our imperfections that He wants to use us the most...because that is when we have to rely on Him more and not lean on our own abilities.“Casting down imaginations, and every high thing that exalteth itself against the knowledge of God, and bringing into captivity every thought to the obedience of Christ;” 2 Cor 10:5
Short prayer: "God please...I have learned my lesson...no more emotional zit moments for me! I pray that everyday I take my eyes off of SELF and put it where it should be...ON YOU and the people you set in my path. Amen."
You Are Graciously Adorned!
❤Jonna
